one time when i was 14, i pretended i was sick so i could stay home from school, i pretended i couldn’t talk, and i pretended to have a really sore throat, turned out my mum was really convinced and worried, so she took me to the hospital, i was very shocked when the doctor actually found out i had laryngitis. the next day i couldn’t talk and had a sore throat, oh irony, art thou a bitch.
stay home from school. save your own life.
IF YOU ARE THE TYPE OF GUY THAT KISSES A GIRL ON THE TOP OF THE HEAD WHEN YOU HUG THEM THEN YOU ARE DOING IT RIGHT MY FRIEND
before you date a girl with a mental illness, remember: saying, “you’re beautiful” won’t balance the chemicals in her brain.
and don’t fucking say, “i’ll be here for you, no matter what,” if you don’t mean it.
don’t think you’re fixing her by saying, “i love you.” because you’re not
This needs more notes.
All of it, but mostly the bolded
i had a crush on this guy and i decided to pull a Pavlov on him by offering him whenever i saw him this brand of candy he seemed to really like and after a while whenever he saw me he got excited for a second then you could see his expression shift to wondering the why the hell was he so happy to see me and i swear it was the evilest thing but also the most hilarious i made a guy like me by conditioning him into associating me to a candy he liked